Firstly, you need to establish trust. I ask you, do you trust yourself and your ability to make good judgments? Trust is all about knowing yourself and how authentic you come across to people meeting you for the first time. Do you give the feeling to others that you are someone who can be relied upon and can keep their word? Do you have faith and belief in others? Can you be relied upon to do the right thing?
These are all questions one needs to ask oneself when looking at the basics in relationship building.
By trusting someone it does not necessarily mean that that person is trustworthy. Being too trusting without thinking about it carefully can sometimes be dangerous. There are people who gain trust and then break it, so you need to use discretion on where you give your trust.
I believe that building your credibility is the next thing to look at when creating solid relationships. Credibility is how your words and deeds are seen by others. Are you trustworthy and do you have the expertise on the subject you are talking about? To gain credibility in the business world you need to prove it firstly by the way you act as well as knowing that the information you pass on is correct and reliable. People will view you by the company you keep and what is perceived as your established reliability.
How you treat others is a reflection on you as a person. It has been said that ‘one should treat others as they would like to be treated’. I personally disagree with this statement. I believe that we ‘should treat others as they would like to be treated’. This is far better from my perspective, as the first way is assuming that the person has the same values as you yourself. The way I would like to be treated would be very different from many other people. Take for example, the giving of a gift. How many times have you been given a gift by someone who gives what they like and is their taste, but quite contrary to your own? It is very easy to assume what others like. The only way to truly know what someone likes is to listen to what they say, watch how they live and observe how they do things.
I believe that making a habit of acknowledging people is a wonderful attribute to have. Making others feel good and worthwhile helps create a relationship. We are not aware, I believe, on what is going on in others lives and praise or kindness can change a person’s life dramatically if they are someone who does not get enough of this in their life. It must be sincere though and come ‘from the heart’. Observing people and acknowledging what they are doing or have created can be very powerful. It is important that we create win-win situations in all our relationships.
To remember important dates and significant events in another’s life can show your awareness of them. Isn’t it nice to be remembered on your birthday or anniversary or if your work mates and friends acknowledge something you have done well? We are sometimes very aware of what is not necessary to remember, and all too often forget the significant times in people’s lives. Bringing joy and happiness to others life can be very easy and simple. Like a smile, it is free!
If you want to create solid lasting relationships, be prepared to invest time and energy into that relationship. Take the first step … don’t wait for the other to take that first action. Relationships that last and are productive for both sides are worth the time and energy that one needs to put into them.
So remember these attributes: trust, credibility, the way you treat and acknowledge others, by remembering important dates and events as well as investing time and energy, are all the basic ingredients to building relationships that last forever.
Jennie is available for one-on-one sessions via Skype or in person.
For more information email her at firstname.lastname@example.org